Brian's wedding memories

There's a picture of me standing in my new suit in my living room, hands in my pockets, on the afternoon of my wedding day. My Dad is sitting on the couch in the background, on the edge, with his arms crossed, staring out at the porch. You get the feeling he's been there before. My mother is fiddling with something on the table. And I'm standing there with my hands in my pocket. A few hours later I was reciting my marriage vows. It's one of my favorite pictures.

It's not your traditional, posed photo. It's quite unremarkable in terms of lighting, composition, and color... but that picture reminds me better than anything else of the feeling I had on that day. Calm. Complete calm.

It's strange actually, because as Ann will tell you, I am never still. While watching a movie or reading in bed, I am always wiggling my feet or playing with my hands. Actually, it drives her to violence sometimes when she's trying to concentrate on a movie and I'm jiggling my toes. But on that day I was completely still

I was so mellow I felt that at any moment I might just sink through my own body. I was just happy. I realized that I was promising to be with Ann Smulders for the rest of my life... and that made me happier than anything else in my life. I went through that day enjoying the whole thing, the ceremony on the porch (presided over by my friend Ken's mom!), the family and friends that were there, the dinner after. Finding the confetti that Ken and Sole left in our bed at the hotel. I remember all of it, but most of all I remember waiting in that room and feeling more calm than ever before in my life.

--Brian